Auditions! Love Is Murder, by Tim Kelly


Auditions for Gaslight Theater’s Valentine’s Day Week show, Love is Murder, by Tim Kelly, will be held December Saturday 17th and Sunday 18th at 6 p.m. at Hallowell City Hall. Please bring proof of Covid-19 vaccination to auditions. Auditions are cold readings.

Love Is Murder, by Tim Kelly, Valentina Velour, the Queen of Romance Fiction, opens Honeymoon House to a television program. Unfortunately, someone has left a dead man in the closet and a wacko called The Rose Killer is bumping off the love scribblers. Confusion and madness abound as vitamin fanatics, cops, literary agents and writers collide. The whole madcap mess concludes with the exposure of Valenetina’s arch-enemy and an affirmation of her philosophy — “Romance will be here when men and women no longer walk the earth!”

Show dates are the weekends of February 10, 11 & 12 and 17, 18 and 19  at Hallowell City Hall Auditorium.

5 Women, 5 Men

Valentina Hart – The selfmade Queen of Romantic Fiction, dripping with regality, snobbery, and gaudy fashion
Effie – Hose maid, hopeless romantic, number one fan of Valentina
Tom Burns/Handsome Marine – Butler, fairly good looking, very new and green
Lydecker – Valentina’s agent, loud and aggressive
Leon Ketchem – TV producer, unbothered, unfazed, disinterested
Jane Err – romance novelist, dark, brooding, like she walked straight out of a Victorian gothic novel (But it’s all a facade, she craves the limelight)
Calamity Lovett – romance novelist, dressed like she’s from a glamorous western. Self assured, rough around the edges, with a twang (Again a facade, for publicity)
Pearl Sweet – dressed in dazzling slinky attire. Vogue, posh, strikes a pose, seducing mirrors
Dr. Wintergreen/Pirate/Simon Grundy – Charming, well dressed and health conscious, all of these to a fault
Ed Fish/Don Alfredo – a bumbling policeman/detective